This Just In: August 2009

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Honest expression

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DrQRS40OKNE

The past year was a tough yet fascinating trial of tribulations. I very much struggled with inner turmoil, doubt, obsessions, addictions, and confusion as a general. I constantly found myself (as I often and always do) asking my self why? Why am I alive? What is it that I am here to do?

The past year was a wonderful year. I very much relearned many things about myself and the world in which I live. The world in which I live is unique to me, just as the world in which you live in is unique to you. We all have a different understanding and relationship with our outward look inward. We are all alone, yet all connected. I have come to an understanding appreciation. My world is determined by me. Your world is determined by YOU. It is up to us all to create the world in which we shall cherish. A world that provides us with the freedom for success. Success is unique to me, success is unique to YOU. My success is happening at this very moment right now as you read this. Is your success happening at this moment, right now as you read this?

I made many decisions that ultimately lead to a semi-self destructive state of acceptance. It seemed as if I had made up my mind, I am who I am and there is no changing that. This is what I told myself, lies, I told myself lies. I am a very capable liar, capable of lying. Lying to myself is really the sad part of it, to myself? Self-destruction is a cruel punishment. (Self-destruction def: the destruction or ruination of oneself or one's life.) Interesting however that self-destruction is both administered and received by oneself.

I wonder if on purpose I was teaching myself a valuable lesson of life?

Fuck yeah, lesson learned!

I had forgotten that life's happiness comes from within, not the other way around. I was too busy searching on the exterior to see the interior. Conceptually this was a no brainer in my earlier years, easier however with less distraction faced at a young age.

The mind is naturally hungry, thirsty and needy for information. Choose wisely, I will.
The body is naturally hungry, thirsty and needy for nutrition. Choose wisely, I will.
The soul is naturally hungry, thirsty and needy for experience. Choose wisely, I will.

BALANCE I WILL